Janna Hasbrouck
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Easing into our new reality

4/23/2020

 
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We have all found ourselves in an involuntary, collective pause. Life events such as weddings, birthdays, anniversaries, and funerals have either been put on hold, canceled or revised. Work life has changed in ways we couldn’t have imagined even a few short weeks ago. We have had to rapidly learn new ways of being as social distancing, mask wearing, and sheltering in place have become the norm.

Our adrenalin has helped us through the initial burst of crisis adaptation.
Now what?
Catastrophes tend to have a rhythm. There’s the initial survival mode where everyone is simply trying to figure out how to protect themselves and their families, then there’s a rush of effort that gradually settles into a patched-together routine.
 
Then comes the hard part… learning to live with your new reality.
 
With the initial flurry of activity over, tension and stress can start to ratchet up which is why compassion, kindness, and patience are essential for navigating this phase.
 
Here are two tools to help you move forward with more confidence and ease.
Get to know your triggers.

​We all have triggers that set up for reactionary behaviors. Any of your senses such as sight, sound, touch, taste, memory, can spark a knee jerk response that seems so automatic that it often feels like an unchangeable characteristic (the good news is that it’s not!).  
 
One of the easiest ways to learn more about your own triggers is to make a list. Write down every time you react to a situation in a way that doesn’t feel good to you. For example, you might notice that every time you get a call from a certain person your default response is to eat a box of cookies, or you might notice that when you feel like you did something wrong you have a tendency to lash out in anger.
 
As you gain an understanding for your triggers, it becomes easier to make empowered responses (even in difficult situations) that reflect your highest self.
You always have a choice. 
 
Viktor Frankl sums up this concept better than I ever could when he said:
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
Choosing your own way through chaos and uncertainty is not easy to do because chaos breeds confusion and lack of clarity. So, if you want to shift from feeling out of control and into more clarity use curiosity to break through the confusion.
 
Here are a few inquiry questions to ask yourself…
  • What do I most need in this moment?
  • What would be the most loving thing I could do for myself?
  • What is the most empowered action I could take?
  • Are my current thoughts and/or behaviors bringing me peace? What do I need in order to shift to more positive ones?

​And remember, when life has been turned upside down it is perfectly natural to fall apart every now and then so most importantly be kind and gentle with yourself. I leave you with a final quote from Viktor Frankl whose words once again say it best:
“An abnormal reaction to an abnormal situation is normal behavior.”

Will you be proud of how you responded to the Covid-19 crisis?

4/1/2020

 
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​These are some crazy times. With mass closings of schools, theme parks, events, and gathering places we face unprecedented upheaval to our schedules and plans. Suddenly, what we pictured our next month to look like has been upended and we are needing to adapt and process the ever-changing information that is coming from every direction. 
 
All of this is a perfect storm for stress and anxiety.
 
Into this mix I offer the reminder that NOTHING is permanent. And, I have a question for you: when the crisis is over, will you be proud of how you responded? In the past week as I have watched my own emotions fluctuate with the uncertainty and confusion, I realized the moments where I was most stressed or agitated were when I focused on outward things that I have no control over, rather than inward on myself and what I can do.
 
To shift out of panic-mode and into solution-mode start by asking yourself “who do I want to be during this time and how do I want to show up?” In a crisis, to think of yourself first is a natural response; however, staying caught in this scarcity mindset will prevent you from helping others while keeping you focused on the problems. This leads to feeling hopeless, demotivated, isolated and paralyzed, which makes it much harder to see what is possible.
 
If you find yourself caught in the chaos, here are a few practical ways to reground:
| Focus on what you do have.
When there’s a hoarding frenzy it can cause feelings of insecurity and trigger a sense that if you don’t jump into the fray you will be left behind. It makes sense to stock up on a few staples so that you limit your contact with the outside world, but then also take a moment to appreciate everything you do have, it’s probably more than you realize.
​​​​​​​
| Connect with a phrase or mantra that     helps you reconnect with yourself.
When I notice I am feeling stressed I like to use the familiar: “And this too shall pass” as a reminder that I am not always going to feel this way. By redirecting my focus I give myself the power to shift how I’m feeling.
| Do something new to engage your mind. Here are a few suggestions:
  • Teach yourself something new, like how to make this soup. It's a Greek lentil and spinach soup which looks easy and delicious and is what I will be making for dinner tonight!
  • Start learning a new language, Duolingo is perfect for this. There are also many online options offered through local libraries.
  • Write an old-fashioned letter to someone. If you know anyone who is feeling isolated during this time, receiving a thoughtful letter could be especially meaningful.
  • Do a project you’ve been putting off like cleaning out the garage, organize a closet, paint a room. The sense of accomplishment when it’s done will go a long way to feeling positive and proactive.
| Find a balance between being informed
​  and being obsessive.

While it’s important to stay up to date with relevant, useful information you will only increase your stress if you don’t give yourself a break from the news!
​With a few simple shifts in mindset and behaviors we can get through this crisis more quickly, and with the knowledge that we showed up for ourselves and others with love and compassion. And for heaven’s sake (that was one of my grandmom’s favorite expressions so it makes me smile when I use it) share your toilet paper with someone who needs it.
 
Wishing you peace and excellent health!
Janna

When life gets complicated...                                        Go back to the basics!

2/26/2020

 
​Between responsibilities, work demands, relationships, and emotional ups and downs, it’s not surprising that we face moments of chaos and uncertainty. When that state of chaos becomes the norm, things get dicey and we can become run down and stuck in overwhelm.
​
​Eventually it starts to feel like all of the ease and joy has been sucked out of life.
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So, what is an exhausted, overwhelmed person to do?

#1 Ease up on the mental gymnastics.

One of the first responses our mind has to stressful situations is to tell stories about why we deserve it, that we’re justified in feeling the way we do, and then it seals the deal by showing how unlikely it is that we’ll be able to turn things around. And we believe every negative word we tell ourselves!

To begin revising this inner dialogue to one that is more supportive, consider this quote from Byron Katie:

“A thought is harmless unless we believe it. It’s not our thoughts, but our attachment to our thoughts, that causes suffering. Attaching to a thought means believing that it’s true, without inquiring. A belief is a thought that we’ve been attaching to, often for years.”
​

Not believing our thoughts is definitely the simplest path to peace, however, it takes lots of practice and that’s where it’s essential to be patient and persistent.

#2 There is a solution

I find it’s very helpful to remind myself of this, even if I have no idea what the answer is at the moment. Keeping your mind focused on the solution helps to calm down the fight or flight response and will get you unstuck because your mind is taking empowered action rather than fixating on the problem. 

#3 Do one small thing 

When we’re looking for ways out of a bad cycle it can often feel like we have to do something major like change jobs, find new friends, move to a different city, end a relationship, stop eating foods we enjoy… And generally, that just adds to the pressure and keeps us from taking any action at all.
Here’s what to do!
Find one small thing you can commit to everyday such as...
  • Drinking more water
  • Sitting in stillness for 5 minutes
  • Prioritize sleep (even going to bed 20 minutes earlier can make a difference)
  • Add in more veggies
  • Take 3 deep breaths 5 times a day
  • Walk for 15 minutes (then gradually work up to 30)
 
Even if you eventually add in more of these habits, start with one that feels easiest and most fun to you. By doing that you set yourself up for success because you are much more likely to stick with it.

#4  Be kinder to yourself

​Self-kindness--the most important one of all! There are few things more demotivating than criticism, and that includes our own inner critics who tend to be the harshest. The words we use are shaped by the beliefs we hold and together they create our experience. Or as Mahatma Gandhi said:
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny. 

If you're done feeling stuck and are ready to create your destiny, the easy next step is to schedule your free consultation with me. In our call you will learn more about what is stopping you from reaching your most important goals and how you can take action to move forward right away.

A Word on Overwhelm

10/30/2018

 
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I have yet to meet anyone who hasn’t, at some point, experienced the feeling of being pulled in a million different directions with no hope of getting it all done, no matter how fast they moved. And since feeling like you are going to be crushed by your to-do list is not a fun place to be, I thought you might find it helpful to have some fast and easy tips to get out of the overwhelm vortex and back into feeling energized and productive.
The easiest place to start when you’re looking for a way out of an emotional tangle is to become familiar with its source.

Overwhelm has two primary triggers:
#1
Focusing on everything at once and feeling like it has to be done now.
#2
Focusing on what you haven’t completed rather than what you have.
Simply put, what we pay attention to is what creates our experience. This is awesome news because it means that we are fully in control of shifting ourselves out of an unwanted experience simply by shifting our focus.
​When you’re ready to stop feeling pulled in a million directions, try this sequence of steps:
| Step back from it.
Take the ‘overwhelm’ out of your head and put it on paper, where you can distance yourself from it a bit. Write down every task you can think of that you are worrying about. I like to call this a brain dump because you literally want to dump out every bit of information that’s floating around in your head
|Chunk it.
Once you’ve done this, organize your tasks and to-dos into larger chunks. You’ll probably come up with your own, but to help you get started, try: family, kids, career, self-care, relationships, health. Organizing your to-dos into chunks will help you see your world more clearly.

|Prioritize it.
Feelings of overwhelm come less from having too much to do and more from feeling like you have to do it all at once. Look at your chunks and prioritize your to-dos based on a combination of what must get done first and what makes you feel strong, empowered, and satisfied. And when you’ve completed an activity find a small way to celebrate your accomplishment (10 min on youtube, a cup of tea, stepping outside into the sun, etc…).  Acknowledging your successes will give you strength and resilience to get through everything else.

|Take action.
Action is the antidote to feeling overwhelmed. Very often it is not the activities themselves that stress us out but our worrying about the activities. Just begin. Very often the simple action of beginning will alleviate the anxiety and stress that has accumulated.

|Consciously choose where you focus.
Worry comes from focusing on what is not getting done which has the side-effect of zapping motivation. And I know it’s tempting to focus on multiple things at once but… I’m here to tell you multi-tasking is a myth.  Studies have shown that our brains can only focus on one thing at a time which means your to-do list will be completed much faster when you give all your attention to the one task at a time.  Not only is this more efficient but it also has the side benefit of reducing stress.
​Let me know what happens when you try these out!
Janna
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    Welcome!  I help people who are ready to live FULL-OUT.  People who are no longer willing to compromise their happiness and are motivated to do what it takes to live a life they love.  Small changes have a huge impact and this blog is about taking one step at a time to create your most amazing life! I look forward to connecting with you soon.
         - Janna

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